Comic Book Review: Secret Invasion #6

I have to apologize up front if I sound incoherent at any part of this review. I am currently totally high on massive quantities of cold medicine as I battle a nice little September cold. Yay me. At any rate, Secret Invasion has been a serviceable read. Still, as a big event Secret Invasion has been a disappointment. Yet, last issue gave me the hope that Bendis will deliver an exciting finale to this event. If nothing else, Secret Invasion #6 should provide the reader with plenty of enjoyable action. We finally get to see Iron Man, Captain America and Thor back together again and fighting on the same side. I have a feeling that Secret Invasion #6 is going to be a fun read. Let’s do this review.

Creative Team
Writer: Brian Michael Bendis
Pencils: Leinel Yu
Inks: Mark Morales

Art Rating: 6 Night Girls out of 10
Story Rating: 4 Night Girls out of 10
Overall Rating: 5 Night Girls out of 10

Synopsis: We begin with Marvel Boy flying around when suddenly one of the Skrull ships from their armada crash lands near Marvel Boy. Out of the wreckage steps Skrull-Vell. (Very convenient.) Skrull-Vell tells Marvel Boy that he must fight to stop the Skrulls from taking over Earth. Skrull-Vell says that the Skrulls will do anything. That the Skrulls will lie to their own people and that the Skrulls will kill anything. Skrull-Vell says that Marvel Boy is here for a reason. Skrull-Vell then reverts back to his Skrull form and dies.

We cut to the Skrulls bringing back online all the various forms of global communications. The Skrulls broadcast their message to the world’s populace. The Skrulls yammer on about how they are here to save the human race from their ineffectual governments. That there will no longer be war, poverty or suffering. That Earth will be made a part of the Skrull Empire, but that the Skrulls have no interest in taking anything from the people of Earth. The people of Earth can keep their culture, their jobs and their homes. That the Skrulls will only be adding.

The Skrull message drones on that they have only attacked super heroes who were defiant. The Skrulls tells everyone to accept being part of the Skrull Empire because resistance would be futile. The Skrulls ask for all the soldiers across the world to stand down. The Skrull message yammers on about change and accepting and embracing change. The message ends with “He loves you very much.”

We cut to Camp Hammond where the Skrulls have set up their command headquarters. Skrully Hank Pym is informed that they still have not heard from the Queen about the Savage Land mission. Skrully Pym is confident that everything is going as planned.

Suddenly, the Queen arrives on the scene. The Queen informs Skrully Pym that Reed Richards has escaped and that the Avengers are now with Reed and that they are on their way to New York.

Pym asks if Janet is still with the heroes. The Queen answers that Janet is still with the heroes. Pym responds “Then we win.” The Queen adds that Janet is a “last resort.”

We cut to the Mighty Avengers and the Secret Avengers in the Skrull ship with Reed. (Oh what the hell, let’s just call this mix mash of characters the plain old Avengers, huh?) Tony is beating himself up and feeling guilty that he let a Skrull onto the Mighty Avengers. (Spider-Woman.) Tony then vows that once he has repaired his armor that he is going to take out Skrully Spider-Woman once he gets his hands on her.

The Avengers then arrive in New York and are stunned speechless at how much damage the Skrulls have wrought in such a short amount of time.

We then slide over to outside of Dr. Strange’s home and see a bunch of college students who are praising the arrival of the Skrulls. The flakey hippie students call the police in the area “fascist pigs” and praise that the Skrulls are here to create a utopia on Earth and that there will be no need for fascist police anymore.

The wacky hippie students see some of the Super Skrull soldiers and clamor about how beautiful the Skrull soldiers are. The hippies run over to the Super Skrull soldiers and ask for their autographs. The hippies yammer on about how they are all about change and how they want to embrace change. (Wow, how timely is Bendis with this “change” theme from the Skrulls given the current theme mentioned over and over in the U.S. Presidential race?)

One of the Super Skrull soldiers fires up his human torch powers and gets ready to barbeque the hippies. (Hey now! These Skrulls aren’t so bad after all.) The police fire at the Super Skrull soldiers.

Nick Fury and his new Howling Commandos along with the Young Avengers suddenly teleport onto the scene. Our heroes immediately attack the Super Skrull soldiers. We see The Hood’s Syndicate of Jobbers, I mean, Criminals watching the battle. The Hood tells the villains to refrain from joining the battle with the Skrulls. The Hood says that they will know when it is the right time to join this battle.

The goofy hippies that Nick Fury and his heroes just saved then call Nick Fury a fascist. The hippies yammer that the Skrulls are here to change the world. The hippies ask Nick “What are you here for?”

Suddenly, we hear thunderous “booms” nearby and see huge lightning bolts crashing down to the ground. We see Thor smashing the ground with his mighty hammer. We see the Avengers in their ship stunned at the sight of Thor. The Avengers fly over to Thor’s location. We also see Captain America arriving at Thor’s location.

Thor asks Captain America “Who are you supposed to be?” Captain America shoots back “Who do I look like?” The Avengers then land their ship and come pouring out and gather around Thor. Thor says that he is summoning the battle that must be fought.

We then see Skrully Pym and Skrully Spider-Woman arrive on the scene with a massive army of Super Skrull soldiers with them.

Reed stammers that the Skrulls have been lying. That the Skrulls are here to punish Earth’s super heroes. That the Skrulls are not here to save Earth. We then see the Thunderbolts arrive on the scene and take formation next to the Avengers.

Iron Man stands there with all the assembled heroes behind him and instructs the Skrulls to leave now and that this is their last warning. Spider-Man quips that the heroes still do not know who they can trust here. Reed responds that they do know. That Reed figured them out. That Reed’s weapon will revert the Skrulls to their natural forms. Reed says this is as fair a fight as they will get.

The Queen replies that Reed invented everything that it took to bring the heroes to their knees. The Queen says that the Earthlings’ hate and judgment is their own. The Queen says that the Skrulls are here to save the Earthlings and to change them. And that the Skrulls are here despite all that the heroes have done to the Skrull Empire.

The Queen then says “He loves you.” Spider-Man asks who “He” is. The Queen responds “God.” (Ummm, that was it? Really? I am sorry, am I supposed to be amazed and impressed? Wow, talking about a huge build up leading to absolutely nothing. Well, it is pretty much a microcosm of this entire Secret Invasion event.)

Nick Fury responds that his god has a hammer. (Snappy.) Iron Man then yells out “Avengers Assemble!” (Damn, that felt good!) Our heroes then charge into combat with the Skrulls. End of issue.

Comments
The Good: Secret Invasion #6 was a disappointment. However, there were still several positive aspects to this issue. First and foremost, it was fantastic to finally see all the Avengers together again and on the same side. I have become so sick and tired of the Mighty Avengers versus Secret Avengers storyline. I did not find it that interesting when it first started up during Civil War and since then this storyline has grown old, tired and stale. This burned out and beat to death storyline needs to be put to rest once and for all.

I would be thrilled if Bendis returned to a unified Avengers team by the end of Secret Invasion. It was so enjoyable to see our heroes sitting on the ship together and acting as a unified front with the Skrulls in their sights. Luke’s statement that the Skrulls have been using the Avengers this entire time suggests that even he is ready to blame everything on the Skrulls and finally move on.

Was it predictable that Bendis would use the Skrull invasion to re-unite the Avengers back into one cohesive force? Absolutely. But, at some point there had to be a resolution to this schism between the two sets of Avengers and the Skrull invasion is as good a reason as any for these two teams to finally come together. It was so refreshing not to have to suffer through anymore of the mind numbing bickering between the two teams that we have gotten a steady diet of for the past couple of years.

I thought that Bendis did a nice job with the wacky hippie students. Wackos like this always crawl out of the woodwork during a crisis. Bendis taps into the vein of all anti-utopian books and movies where there are always some sheep in the populace who want some “perfect” egalitarian government to take care of them in every possible manner.

Bendis teases the reader with a cryptic statement from Skrully Hank Pym that Janet is the Skrull’s ace in the hole. That the Skrulls will use Janet as a last resort to succeed in this invasion. I would imagine that if Janet was a sleeper Skrull that Reed’s device would have already exposed her as a Skrull. I am curious to see what Bendis has in store for Janet’s character as we head to the conclusion of this event.

Now, I will admit that the manner in which Bendis has Thor calling out “the battle that must be fought” was a bit cheesy and an extremely convenient way to pull all the major players into the battle field for the climactic battle. But, it is always cool to see a pissed off Thor.

And Bendis has Thor acting like a true god and warrior in this scene. Our heroes have been taking it on the chin from the Skrulls up to this point. It was nice to finally see our heroes flexing their muscles and when it comes to intimidation not many characters can do it like Thor.

I absolutely adored the ending to Secret Invasion #1. It was fantastic seeing all the heroes together and on the same side. And it was even better to see Iron Man standing front and center and leading the heroes into battle by barking out “Avengers Assemble.” This is what I have been waiting to see for a very long time. I was surprised that Bendis, a notorious Tony Stark basher, let Tony assume the slot as the top dog in this dramatic moment.

The Bad: Secret Invasion #6 was more of the same. We get another heaping helping of nothing with this issue. Bendis’ story has lacked substance and depth from the start and Secret Invasion #6 continues that trend.

The pacing on Secret Invasion has been painfully slow. This has to be one of the slowest moving big events that I have ever read. Bendis manages his best to progress this story along at such an excruciatingly slow pace that this story practically achieves the perfect state of stasis.

The pacing is so slow that it becomes obvious to the reader that Bendis is stalling. Secret Invasion #6 reads like Bendis is trying to stretch out this story as much as possible. And the reason for that is because Secret Invasion is a simple and one-dimensional action story that is best suited as a four issue mini-series.

However, because this is a “big event” Marvel has to have this story run for eight issues in order to properly bilk the reader for as much money as possible. The longer the event is stretched then the more months worth of Secret Invasion tie-in issues can be cranked out.

There is no doubt that Secret Invasion is a thin story that only has enough material for four issues. Each issue that we get is simply more evidence of Bendis doing his best to fluff up each issue with pointless scenes and to progress the story as slowly as possible in order to burn time and stretch this story out over eight issues.

The plotting on Secret Invasion has been atrocious. This story wanders around aimlessly and there seems to be a general lack of direction and purpose during the vast majority of these issues. Another problem with the plotting is that Bendis repeats himself way too much. Secret Invasion is so repetitious that the reader begins to feel that they are reading the same issue over and over again.

A good example of this is that we had to sit through yet another Skrull transmission explaining their conquest of Earth to the general populace. We got practically this exact same scene with nearly the exact same information in the last issue when the Skrulls addressed the general populace of Earth. This was not that complex or interesting of a concept in the first place as to require Bendis to feed it to use for a second time in Secret Invasion #6. The reader is not that stupid and the concept is not that interesting.

Another example is the dialogue between the Avengers on their ship which we have all read before on this title. Since Secret Invasion is lacking in depth and the number of quality themes and plotlines, Bendis is forced to continually repeat the same paltry few themes.

An example of how Bendis always adds in some pointless scenes is evidenced with the Marvel Boy and Skrull-Vell scene in Secret Invasion #6. This scene did nothing to advance a single plotline or get the reader more interested in this story. And this was another complete waste of a character in Skrull-Vell that had some potential. Why bother giving this character his own mini-series to only use him in such a superficial manner in Secret Invasion?

Bendis basically does absolutely nothing with Skrull-Vell other than have him rampage through some Skrull ships and then die. Seriously? Is that the best that Bendis could come up with? The use of Skrull-Vell’s character was about as unimpressive as Bendis’ bungled handling of the 1970’s heroes in the Savage Land.

The poor plotting also creates a story that progresses in a clunky fashion. Secret Invasion has moved in a rather herky-jerky manner with few smooth transitions. This story has never had a cohesive or pleasant flow. Instead, Bendis has relied on numerous random and convenient plot devices to progress this story along. This gives Secret Invasion an awkward feel and gives the reader the impression that Bendis is just making up the story as he goes along with very little foresight or planning. It also makes Secret Invasion read like a poorly crafted story.

Bendis stunned me by not delivering any action at all until we finally arrive at the last two pages of this issue. In a story that is as one-dimensional and unoriginal as Secret Invasion, it is imperative that the writer at least deliver a fast paced and action packed issues. Well choreographed brawl scenes full of furious action can go a long way to make up for an issue that lacks creativity and depth. Unfortunately, Bendis fails to do this and the result is an issue that is dull and boring up until the very end.

Bendis’ dialogue was stiff and generic. There seems to be little effort into crafting the dialogue of the various characters. Some of the dialogue is downright cheesy as Bendis gives us some ham handed and overly dramatic lines. The drama on Secret Invasion is superficial and forced. And that makes the dialogue seem that much campier. All of the characters deliver their lines as if they were actors in a cheap low budget movie.

The poor dialogue and lack of chemistry goes hand-in-hand with the fact that Bendis has failed to perform any character at all on Secret Invasion. Each character glides lifelessly through the story like the one-dimensional cardboard cutout that they are.

The “surprise” reveal that the “He” that the Skrulls have been talking about is God was massively anti-climactic and a real disappointment. The idea of a group of people conquering another group in the name of God or Allah is incredibly unoriginal. This is certainly an extremely well worn theme that has been done numerous times before and certainly in a far better fashion than what Bendis gives us.

This “surprise” reveal just fell flat on its face. I could have cared less. So the Skrulls launched this attack in God’s name. Big deal. We have been doing that for our entire history.

I guess Bendis is trying to make some commentary about the foolishness of using God as a reason to attack another country. It is a sophomoric debate. The fact is that humans will always use some excuse to wage war. If not God then it will be for a myriad of other reasons.

The entire religious aspect to the Secret Invasion has been completely unnecessary in the first place. I think the fact that Earth’s heroes have consistently humiliated and inflicted massive damage on the Skrull Empire is more than enough reason to have the Skrulls want to take down our heroes. That is certainly a more powerful and interesting motivation for the Skrulls to attack our heroes in such a vicious and devious manner.

I am just not a fan of Yu’s style of artwork. I keep trying to open myself up to Yu’s art and I keep trying to find the positives with Yu’s artwork. The fact is that I just find Yu’s artwork to be dull, sketchy and sloppy looking and the characters’ faces are downright hideous at times.  Having said that, I did dig how Yu drew Thor when he was hammering the ground.

Overall: Secret Invasion #6 was another underwhelming issue. Secret Invasion #6 fails to do any one thing well. This issue fails as an action adventure story since there is a paucity of action as the reader is flooded with numerous talky, boring and dull scenes. This story fails as a riveting drama and character piece since all the characters are flat and one-dimensional and the story itself is thin, shallow, slow and unoriginal.

I could forgive the lack of action in Secret Invasion #6 if Bendis was crafting an incredibly complex and intriguing story. And I could forgive a shallow story in Secret Invasion #6 if there was plenty of fun and exciting action. Unfortunately, Secret Invasion #6 was the worst of both worlds.

Having said that, if you have enjoyed what Bendis has been doing for the past couple of years on New Avengers then you will probably enjoy Secret Invasion #6. And if you have been having fun reading Secret Invasion up to this point then you will probably also like Secret Invasion #6.